steps to ensure the well being of your children

by: dr. laura richter
posted: tuesday, november 29, 2013

Studies have shown children who make the best adjustments after divorce are the ones whose parents are able to effectively co-parent, leaving their own differences aside and doing what is best for the children.

Most of the time, couples divorce because they no longer wish to work toward resolving ongoing issues.

One factor that is often overlooked is that while couples no longer need to meet each other's needs in the relationship, they still need to interact for the sake of their children.

Agreement on differing parenting styles during marriage is challenging enough, but it becomes even more difficult to address after divorce.

To effectively co-parent, each partner must be able to put aside their own differences and focus on the needs of their children.

For example, children have the right to love and be loved by both of their parents without being made to feel disloyal or disapproved of by one or the other partner.

Most importantly, children should not be made to feel they are in the middle of any conflict, that any of the divorce is their fault, or that they need to serve as an intermediary for messages back and forth or to have the burden of hearing either parent complain about the other.

When it is too overwhelming to handle on your own, it is wise to seek the help of a professional to sort this out.

Family therapy can be very effective in helping parents and children in reorganizing after a divorce so that everyone benefits.